Get In Time Out!

I never thought I would be spending any of my days in 'time out' as a 30 year-old...but I am. It took me a long time to realize that I needed a time out but I can assure you it was long overdue. I have learned so many lessons and have been reminded of so many things that I don't know when I will ever be able to get out of my corner, but what I do know is that I'm not coming out until I learn my lessons...all of them.

As a wife and a mother I write a lot about being busy, keeping everyone on schedule and making sure that each day runs as smoothly as possible. When you are caught up in the middle of everyday life you can lose sight of a lot of things and that is exactly what happened to me. There was no stopping to smell the roses, taking time to really enjoy a story from beginning to end or even the ability to get caught up in a movie without thinking about what I had to do after the movie was over. Those things are important but they were not important enough for me to sit down. What did it for me, was when I started forgetting my blessings. Losing sight of all of the great things God had done for me, forgetting all of the things He had delivered me from and forgetting to thank Him in the process was more than enough for me to realize that I needed a minute to collect myself.

It is no secret that I take physical fitness very seriously and that I have been fighting an uphill battle to get back in shape after suffering 3 miscarriages and eventually carrying and delivering my youngest child who is now 15 months. Truthfully, I have made great strides in getting back in shape but I had started to let situations and people get the best of me. Recently I took a trip down south to visit family and I must have heard about how much weight I had gained over the past 3 years at least 10 times. Even though I knew that I had actually lost a lot of weight over the past several months, since they hadn't seen me in years they had a different perspective - - just follow me. When I made the trip, I was (and still am) on a very successful eating and workout plan but after a weekend of hearing certain family members talk about my weight I was tempted to throw in the towel and eat until I passed out. Even after the trip I allowed even more family members to speak into my life about what they thought I should do to lose weight.

My daughter is excelling in school while becoming a great talent in playing the trumpet. My son is just an awesome little boy who is excited to learn something new everyday. My husband is working HARD to provide for our family and in the meantime is spoiling me beyond my wildest dreams. All of that is going on but I couldn't enjoy any of it because all I was thinking about was what my extended family had to say about my weight.

I can't tell you exactly when, but it seemed like out of nowhere I heard a still small voice: "Taryn, you mean to tell me that you are going to let people who have no idea what you have gone through or what it takes to begin to live a healthy lifestyle steal and rob you of your joy because you have put on weight? You are getting up every morning to work out when just 2 years ago you couldn't even walk. Did you forget? Do you remember why you couldn't walk? Let me remind you - you couldn't walk because you had lost yet another baby and needed abdominal surgery to save your life. You have the nerve to be down in the dumps about your weight when I have blessed you with an amazing baby boy who lights up every room he enters? If you have forgotten where I've brought you from...you need a TIME OUT."

I immediately fell to my knees and thanked God for speaking to my heart. He wasn't telling me that I needed to just accept where I am and not continue working toward my goals, He just wanted me to be appreciative, dedicated and grateful during the journey. He required that I put things in their correct order. It was time to get back in the Word and back off of Facebook; do more bible studies and log off of Twitter; wake up and talk to God before getting dressed to go to the gym.

Do you need a time out? Are you worried about what your co-workers are doing and not focused enough on your own work? Are you listening to too many of your friends' marital problems while your own spouse is lonely? Are you truly upset about something someone posted on a social media site while your own family hasn't been able to have a real conversation with you in weeks? It may be time for you to clear some space in a corner and get in it.

Time out has made me calmer, more peaceful, more confident, more determined, more focused and most importantly...more thankful. I may not be exactly where I want to be, but in the grand scheme of things...I wouldn't trade in my little boy's sloppy wet kisses and his excitement when he sees his big sister for all the 6-packed stomachs in the world - but I will pass on the chips and eat an apple...welcome to Time Out:)